Not Drinking Alcohol is Your Superpower
While being the only one in the room not drinking feels like a weakness, it’s really your strength.
Quitting drinking, getting sober, or otherwise changing your habits around alcohol is generally a jarring experience.
Especially if you’re someone like me, who, in the end became a daily drinker.
When your life until now has revolved around alcohol, the idea of removing it feels impossible. As if there is no way that you could possibly navigate a social environment, a birthday, a wedding, or even a stressful day without the help of your old friend — wine.
In my Functional Sobriety Academy, I have worked with hundreds of women who run the gamut on their past drinking experiences, their goals and desires around quitting or cutting back, and I’ve heard thousands of stories of navigating these seemingly impossible settings where alcohol is the main character.
One particular story comes to mind of a client of mine, Lisa.
Lisa has come in and out of her sobriety journey for years— sustaining some periods of long-term cessation, followed by months or years back to the wine.
Social environments tended to be her kryptonite.
If everyone around her was drinking, she found it impossible to say no. She felt this deep urge to fit in, and a need to be accepted and liked. She felt that if she said “no” to the wine being passed around the table, that somehow this would isolate her from the rest of the group.
These experiences were the ones that would send her back into months of drinking and having to claw her way back to a few weeks of sobriety with more and more effort.
It was exhausting.
Lisa shared with me that she has felt this way since she was young. She felt that by not drinking, she was letting her friends or family down in some way.
She felt that saying no to drinking meant that she was weak. That she “couldn’t handle” alcohol like everyone else can. And that this difference between her and the group meant that she was less than.
OOF.
If you’ve been there, you’re not alone! Lisa’s story is like that of so many others. The intense need to be “a part of” is very real, especially for women.
I told her what I tell so many others:
Being the only person in the room not drinking is not a weakness, it is a strength. It is a superpower.
It is HARD as heck to experience the world without the help of alcohol, which can always be trusted to dull the edges of our stress while providing false highs and the illusion of it making us better in some way.
(Congratulations to big alcohol for many, many years of successful alcohol campaigns 🙄)
The reality: Saying no is not a weakness. It is the ultimate example of strength.
It’s the easy path to drink and join in with the crowd. It’s the path of least resistance to follow along, not ask questions, and fade into the background.
The path of sobriety, or alcohol-free living, is the road less traveled.
You WILL have to pave the path, especially if you’ve been hitching a ride with alcohol for your entire life until now.
But, this path is the one that leads us to gold. Liken it to the first settlers that headed west. They had no idea what they would find. It was untrodden, it was scary, there were bumps in the road. But ultimately, they struck gold.
It is only after difficult experiences that we become resilient. We develop bigger muscles. We develop more wisdom. We reach the places beyond our wildest dreams.
So, my friend, I offer you the space today to think about this reframe. That being the only one not drinking doesn’t make you “lame” or “boring” or “less than” in any way.
That being the one saying no is strength, humility, power, agency. Saying no to a drink is not a denial of being part of. It is the acceptance of yourself, choosing your body and mind over all else.
And this, well this is your superpower.
Sending you love, and permission to change your mindset.
Xo, Dr. Brooke
Doors close soon on our summer class of the Functional Sobriety Academy!
Ditch the shame. Reclaim your health. Feel better than you thought possible without alcohol in just 8 weeks.
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LIVE weekly online sessions – Engage, ask questions, get immediate support
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Personalized nutrition plans + recipes – Tailored to your cravings & health
Supplement coaching + up to 20% off partner products
Optional at-home lab testing – Dig deeper into your unique health needs
Full access to our community – Accountability and support in the Functional Sobriety Network
20+ hrs bonus trainings – From gut healing to wearable tech insights
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